It seems now that Jesse’s ex-wife.
May be trying to ruin his life.
Cuz this tattoed gal.
Is also her pal.
And caused all this marital strife.

There once was an actress named Sandy.
Who’s husband’s a little too randy.
He could hardly refuse.
A ‘bombshell’ with tattoos.
Her pre-nup just might come in handy.

It’s sad news about Corey Haim.
Who’s died and the drugs are to blame.
We loved all his flicks.
But he needed the fix.
That comes with the trappings of fame.

Lohan’s lawyers are suing E*Trade.
For using ‘Lindsay’ without getting paid.
They say it’s implied.
Cuz she’s always fried.
But a jury will never be swayed.

I guess I should probably be sad.
Lindsay did all the drugs that she had.
But its always the same.
And I think that its lame.
That she puts the blame all on her dad.

Brad Pitt has yet to succumb
To being kept under Jolie’s thumb.
I’d say that it’s brave.
To hide out in his cave.
while Angie hangs out with his mum.