It’s always amazing to me.
When Idol returns to TV.
Thousands come from afar.
Hoping they’ll be a star.
But of talent there’s no guarantee.
Aerial Assault
StandardWhen pulling in our parking lot.
I was pleased to get the closest spot.
But far from good luck.
Ten birds crapped on my truck.
So the closeness it seems was for naught.
San Antonio Stroll
StandardWhen moving into a new city.
And working to try and be witty.
We’ll do what we know.
As we start our first show.
And try hard not to be #@$tty.
Fresh Ink
StandardMy friends the rumors are true.
That the WOLF has bid us adieu.
I’ll miss doing the show.
After getting let go.
But I think I’ll go get a tattoo.
Taking a Mulligan
StandardWood’s life has hit a new low.
So he wants to go on Oprah’s show.
If your life’s a disgrace.
There’s no better place.
When it comes to the eating of crow.
Frigid
StandardAs Denver remains in deep freeze.
At eight measly friggin’ degrees.
I’m afraid if I cough.
Something may just fall off.
As my daughter would say, “Geez Louise”!
Thirteen
StandardMy oldest daughter is now thirteen.
Causing problems unforeseen.
Out go the toys.
And in come the boys.
I may have to call the marines.
Censorship? No.
StandardAdam Lambert is once again banned.
From live tv by network command.
Despite what they say.
It’s not cuz he’s gay.
He’s not trusted to do what’s been planned.
O Tannenbaum
StandardTelling Jesse was a mistake.
That our Christmas Tree is a fake.
He says that its bad.
But my kids are glad.
Cuz it gives me more time to bake.
Orna-mental
StandardEach year I go ornament shopping.
To buy at least eight without stopping.
I went to St. Nick.
And that did the trick.
After an hour of flip-flopping.
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