Through Twitter they’ve both volunteered.
They weren’t as happy as they appeared.
Cuz now Jim and Jen.
Are both single again.
I put the blame on his beard.
Fit To Be Tried
StandardDid you hear the news ’bout Marc Cherry.
Who temper can be legendary.
He got upset.
And hit Nicollette.
Now she’ll get all the cash she can carry.
Friend Un-request
StandardLast month I decided to send.
A request to add my bro as a friend.
Guess I over-stepped.
Cuz he won’t accept.
Wonder what I have done to offend?
Bunny Fun
StandardHere’s what I’m doing this Easter.
First I’ll go visit the priest-er.
Then scarf down some sweets.
And other fine eats.
Before sitting around on my keester.
‘Fool’ Gold
StandardIt seems to me each April Fool.
When practical jokes are the rule.
I’m so naive.
And quick to believe.
This holiday borders on Cruel.
What to Do?
StandardMy girls are in town for Spring Break.
Which I hope they don’t think’s a mistake.
Every day in the sun.
Finding stuff that is fun.
Is not really a piece of cake.
Conjugal Visit?
StandardAt the Masters next week in Augusta.
Where Tiger will kick off the rust-a.
The porn star named James.
May be crashing the games.
So I hope he can control his lust-a.
Hair We Go Again
StandardI would never have imagined that.
Secrest’s hair must be ironed out flat.
He’s Idol’s emcee.
But if it were me.
I’d probably just wear a hat.
No Justice
StandardOn Thursday at lunchtime, some schmuck.
Broke out the window of my truck.
They stole all my stuff.
But it wasn’t enough.
So insurance is passing the buck.
‘Dancing’ Diva
StandardKate Gosselin has spent lots of cash-es.
For highights and new longer lashes.
She’s hoping your vote.
Will keep her afloat.
She’ll be gone long before Neicey Nash is.
Shotgun's Daily Limerick 